Finding Reality
by Pretty.Odd.Xx
Summary: Think it's strange to find comfort in your ex's, new girlfriends, ex? Yea me too. Yet here we are... Bella finds herself learning to start over, fresh out of a long term relationship and finds comfort in the strangest person of all. You just never know what the future may bring for you, or who it may bring into your life... Love, lies, and lemons!
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys, I haven't written in several years now so please be gentle. I decided I needed to write out some feelings and what better way to do it then write a story and use some of my favorite book characters as a way to help me write up a good one! Hope you guys enjoy! **

**Also don't you worry, this is indeed a Bella X Edward story but there had to be some back story to lead up to it! This is an all human story!**

**Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight!**

**Roll on Chapter 1!**

Jake and I had been together going on five years now, high school sweethearts. I was a freshman and he was a sophomore when we first met. I started high school off in a new town, not a single friend to be had. But Jake from the first day I met him, was nothing but kind to me.

At the time, my parents Charlie and Renee could hardly stand each other anymore and we were starting off in a new town for them to try to 'rekindle their relationship'. Long story short on that end, my parents ended up divorcing my junior year.

But thank god that I had Jacob to help me get through it. When I first met Jake, we were in art class. I would sit there with my headphones in at the end of the long table and mind to my myself as I worked on my project.

Jake sat at the other end of the table with a few of who I assumed were his friends and we only ever made eye contact for the first few weeks of class. A few weeks into the course I completed my first big project. My art teacher Mrs. G asked me up to her desk to talk to her, and here I was scared shitless that she hated my work. However, she asked me if I would be interested in moving up to the other end of the large work table to sit with the advanced art kids, as apparently she thought my work was 'special'.

So here I was, an awkwardly tiny freshman standing at a whopping height of five feet tall, now sitting at the end of the table with roughly six huge upperclassmen. I was small but had definite shape to my body, I had a perfect hourglass shape and a nice ass, but I really was nothing special.

"Bella, right?" One of the tall boys asked as I sat down to my new seat. I nodded and smiled politely, as I went to put my headphones in as I always did.

"I'm Jacob Black" The boy introduced himself with a smile. "Can I see your drawing? Mrs. G seems impressed so it must be good."

I gently slid my large portrait across the table to him and took my earphones out before I even had both of them in.

"Well Bella, I'd say that's pretty damn impressive" He smiled his kind smile at me.

Jacob was beautiful. He probably stood a good six foot tall, had the most beautiful carmel complexion, and had a smile that made me instantly feel butterflies.

I thanked him and took my drawing back from him, continuing on with my newest project.

We didn't talk any more that week. Everyone around me talked and laughed amongst themselves as they all seemed to be friends and I was just a guest in their midst.

"You have to come to this new art club I am starting after school today Bella." Angela, a sweet girl that I got paired up with in Spanish, said with excitement. She was in my art class as well but we had never talked much since I always tried to keep to myself.

"I don't know Angela, I don't know anyone…"

"Well how do you expect to meet anyone if you don't open yourself up and come to my super cool new club?" She chuckled. "Please Bella, it'll be fun."

I knew she was right. I was never going to make any friends if I didn't open myself up.

That day after school, I wandered into the art room to find Angela sitting on one of the tables with several others.

"Everybody this is Bella, she's extremely talented" Angela smiled and announced to her friends as I blushed.

A few of the kids I didn't recognize, but there were a few that I did. One of them to my surprise, was Jacob Black.

Art club ended up being a safe haven for me, and for a lot of us. Many of us had weird home lives and we all just seemed to click. We almost never actually worked on art, more then anything it just became a fun social hour. I was finally making friends and I was starting to feel more at home. Jacob was a jokester I learned pretty quickly, always telling a funny story or trying to make me laugh. After a few months, I was starting to grow a pretty serious crush on him.

Let me tell you, it took me pretty off guard when I learned that Jacob had a girlfriend. Leah was her name, and apparently she went to school on the reservation where he lived. Jacob went there for a while too I guess, before he was kicked out for bad grades. He said he spent too much time on his art and Leah that he neglected his schooling pretty bad, which now ended him up here.

The school year flew by in a blur and before I knew it, we were all getting ready to go on summer vacation. We all went over to Angela's house for a last club meeting of the school year and man did we have a blast. Jacob gave me his phone number, and I gave him mine as we had become fast friends at this point. The first few weeks of summer flew by and I will never forget the feeling that crossed over me as out of the complete blue, my phone lit up with a message from none other then Jake.

He wanted to meet up at our outside art club spot near our high school. Of course I obliged, Jake had become a good friend and I was excited to meet up with him just he and I. That night, we sat outside and chain smoked cigarettes and talked for hours. He about half way through the evening revealed to me that he and Leah had broken up after many years of dating. She had cheated on him. He was absolutely crushed, and I will never forget the pained look on his face as he revealed details to me. I have never been able to understand cheating. It destroys the person who you cheat on, and for what? As far as I am concerned, if you are unhappy, leave. Seems pretty simple to me.

Anyways, Jacob and I over the course of the summer, and into the beginning of the next school year started spending more and more time together. He was everything my little fifteen year old heart desired.

For a good portion of my sophomore year, we had a _thing_ going on I guess you could say. We both liked each other, that much was obvious. But I think both of us were just so afraid to ruin things and jump full throttle into a relationship, potentially risking the friendship we had built. After school almost every day Jake and I would head to his house and go straight up to his room. And I know what everyone was probably thinking, Jake and I had to have been screwing around.. Wrong. We spent every evening laying on his bed watching TV, or simply listening to music and staring into each others eyes having deep conversations all night long. Life was so simple and I was actually feeling a sense of happiness for the first time in years. Jake and I both suffered from pretty bad depression, and for a while there I feared that I was going to lose him to suicide. Things were pretty tough for a while. But we both felt so whole when we were together, and things were finally starting to feel okay.

One night, we had been talking for hours and it was late. He was playing the most beautiful and relaxing playlist showing me some of his favorite songs and I don't recall it happening, but I suddenly was drifting to sleep. All I remember was just feeling so at peace, and safe. I'll never be able to forget that feeling. As I was drifting off, I suddenly felt his lips ever so gently press against mine in such a loving way, I cuddled into him and we both fell asleep. We woke up to my phone ringing, it was my dad wondering where the hell I was. It was late and my dad sounded pissed. My parents only pretended to care when they wanted someone to yell at and take their own unhappiness out on. Jake gave me the biggest hug as I left that night. He knew I was going to have a hell of a time at home.

I will never forget the date, it was May seventeenth. I was now sixteen, my birthday had passed a month prior, and he was seventeen. We walked up to the park just up from my house and laid down on the wood chips looking up at the crazy incoming stormy weather. He asked me officially to be his girlfriend.

Freshly sixteen and seventeen years old and we were in love.

Jacob took up most of my high school years. We were utterly obsessed with each other as most teenagers in relationships are. I started spending more and more time at his house as things officially started crumbling with my parents my Junior year. I even spent a lot of nights over there as my parents didn't seem to question where I was. I went on vacations with his family and things were good.

Jakes family became like my own. He was one of five kids, and he was the second oldest. His older brother Sam struggled with substance abuse, his next brother down Quil was such a sweetheart and just two years younger then me and was obsessed with video games. And then he had a little half brother and sister, Embry and Rachel who were the sweetest little peanuts around. We spent most of the time taking care of those kids as Jakes mom kind of started to do her own thing. His parents had divorced when he was really young. His mom Emily was a major gold digger always going after the next rich man she could find. The last guy she was with who was the dad to the two little ones, was a major piece of shit and was really abusive. We were all glad when she got out of that. His dad Billy on the other hand was a very modest older gentleman in a wheelchair. Jake had a weird relationship with him as his mom always tried to paint a not so pretty picture about him, I felt bad.

By the beginning of my senior year of high school, Jake had already graduated and was mainly staying at home to help out with his little brother and sister. I stayed over at his moms house most nights as my home life was absolute shit. When my mom finally moved out of my dads house and insisted that I come with her, thats when things really went wild. She was out every night drinking, not paying our bills, and there was never any food in our apartment. It was a sad fucking mess to be honest with you. My dad was having his midlife crisis, and a workaholic and I didn't see him for about a year. It was hard working my full time job while still in high school just to make sure my mom and I ate. Jacob on the other hand still did not have a job as he was basically the live in nanny for his siblings.

Life was not how I ever thought it would be by the time I turned eighteen.

Jakes mom ended up for a third time, latching onto another wealthy man and they opened up their own coffee shop in town.

I swear, Emily just wanted to keep her kids all so under her thumb. She gave Jake and his two other brothers jobs there so they would always be around and not leave town or do anything else with their lives but rely on her. That is absolutely what she wanted.

Jake was my everything. My absolute everything at a mere eighteen years old. But things started to feel different.

Emily hired a few other people to work at their shop as well, but absolutely insisted that no girlfriends work there. Which is funny as his older and younger brother both had their girlfriends working there within six months. Things felt off. And let me tell you why.

So, suddenly one day Jake mentioned this new co worker and how cool she was. Her name was Tanya. So, here me being like oh cool I have to meet her, I go down to hang out at the shop and it was just Jake and Tanya working.

Tanya was relatively tall, she has stringy blonde hair, grey blue eyes, and absolutely no shape to her body at all. She was like a bean pole.

So here's the thing, it took me all of about a minute of listening to this girl talk and seeing the way that she looked at my boyfriend, to realize I was not a fan. I could smell her fake bullshit from the first minute of meeting her. But let me tell you, apparently I was the only one. Within the next few months, all anyone could talk about was Tanya and how great she was. Tanya even started calling Emily mom. She all of a sudden was like Emily's new daughter. She started coming to all the family meals and holidays, she had found her perfect meal ticket and she knew it, thats for sure.

She knew I didn't like her, and she knew exactly why. She knew I was onto her.

That June, I graduated high school. Life was going on and Emily had announced she was getting married.. again and she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Guess who else was asked to be a bridesmaid? Yep I can pretty much guarantee you guessed right. Tanya.

Jake moved into his own little apartment that summer and you can imagine that put some kind of distress on our relationship when at that point, we had been talking about getting a place together for several years. He said he wanted us to live on our own to get the experience of it and learn to take care of ourselves. Mind you, at this point I had been taking care of myself for years. Things became tense pretty quickly as well when all of a sudden Jake and Tanya were now hanging out, outside of work. I started showing signs of visible upset whenever Jake would mention Tanya in any conversation, and I couldn't help it.

"You're being ridiculous Bella, you know that Tanya has a boyfriend right? You are being so immature." Jake hissed as he sipped his coffee.

"That's great and all Jacob but I am not stupid. A woman knows when someone has intentions of certain kind with their man. I just have a gross gut feeling about her."

Jacob was quiet for a minute before he quietly said "Bella, I think you should leave." My world shook. This wasn't my Jacob anymore.

And at that, Jacob and I split up. I drove back to my dads house where I had a few weeks prior, permanently moved back in after I had a major blowout with my mom. I couldn't handle the verbal abuse anymore. Thankfully, my dad had gotten his funk out of his system and I had him to fall back on for once. Because after all these years, I could no longer fall back on Jacob.

Jake and I were only apart for about a week before he apologized and we re kindled. That one week though, I did nothing but cry in bed very single day. We are talking open mouth, ugly sobs. My dad was acting like a parent for the first time since I was a small child, and bless his heart, he did everything he could to try and make me feel better. It was just a weird time in my life.

Anyways, Jacob had me come over to his place and I of course took him back. He was my safety blanket for so many years, and I always felt whole again when I was with him.

About a month later, Emily's wedding was upon us. Jacob had made a solid effort to stop hanging out with Tanya without me ever asking him to, which I had to at least appreciate. I was back with my Jacob and life was good.

"This is where you kids will be staying for the weekend" Emily said excitedly as she showed me to the room we would be staying in for the wedding weekend.

Emily was getting married that next day at the most beautiful location I had ever seen. It was a gorgeous, brand new building way up at the very top of a massive hill, overlooking where they normally have ski hills in the winter. The view from up there was magical, there were nothing but massive green trees for as far as the eye could see. And the building was absolutely exquisite. Very Emily. She had become so obsessed with everything being nothing but the best, like she was trying to prove something to herself and everybody else. This was so out of my normal, I felt so out of my element in a place like this.

I had gone out ahead of everyone with Emily to get things set up and ready for the rehearsal dinner we would be having that evening. Emily and I continued back downstairs and went about setting up the tables and placing small white tea lights all around the large foyer, when I heard the massive door open behind me.

Great. Tanya was here. I tried to force a smile to her, however I can't imagine it looked all too convincing.

"Mom this place is amazing!" She shrieked as she flew right in past me and to Emily's side.

As soon as Tanya arrived, the others seemed to all follow behind her. Thank god, Jacob was here.

"Hey" He said sweetly as he bent down to give me a kiss. I felt a sense of relief wash over me instantly.

"Where's your guy at tonight Tanya?" Jakes older brother Sam chimed in. Sam was celebrating a year of sobriety from heroin in a few weeks, and we were all ecstatic that he was back on the straightened arrow finally doing well.

"Oh he should be here tomorrow in the morning before the wedding, he has to work late tonight." Tanya replied.

"I haven't seen the dude since high school" Sam said looking excited.

"You guys knew each other?" I asked. "That's cool."

"Yea we used to get into a lot of trouble together back in the day" He chuckled.

"Small world" I replied. Tanya rolled her eyes.

Later that evening after the rehearsal dinner finished up, we all decided we had better get to bed early as we had to get up early the next morning for hair and makeup before pictures.

Jake, Quil and I went up to our room where Emily had us set up for the evening and before I knew it I could hear Tanya's voice coming down the hallway.

"Looks like I'm rooming with you guys tonight!" Tanya said with a smirk as she walked into our room with her overnight bag in tow.

You had got to be kidding me. It was so brutally awkward between us as we hadn't said a word to each other all evening.

"Great" I mumbled to myself as I headed for the little bathroom attached to our room to retreat for a minute.

"Bells" Jacob called behind me as I went to shut the door behind me, and he slipped in right before I could close it.

"I love you" He said quietly with a weak smile as he walked up to pin me against the counter.

He lifted me up so I was now sitting on the edge of the bathroom counter. He slid between my legs and gently grabbed my face.

"You know that I love you Bells" His voice was now a whisper.

Before I knew it, his mouth was on mine. I felt a sense of urgency in his kiss, he was starting to work himself up.

Just then, there was a knock at the bathroom door.

"Guys, I've gotta take a leak" Quil's voice rang out from the other side of the door.

Jake pulled away from me with a dark look in his eyes. I knew that look. He would have taken me then and there if his brother wouldn't have interrupted us. God I wish he would have.

"Seriously guys stop making out and let me in!"

I hopped down from the counter and walked out with Jake on my heels. The look on Tanya's face was sour as I turned to look at her. Good.

We all got into our pajamas and Jake and I crawled into our bed, as Tanya and Quil got into each of theirs. I was exhausted from the long day and was just ready to be out of this god forsaken room. Suddenly Jake's phone pinged and he picked up off the night stand. He immediately chuckled at whatever message he had just received. Immediately Tanya let out a little laugh of her own and looked over at him from over her phone she was very clearly texting him on. You had got to be kidding me. Were we in middle school? Jake seemed to send her a reply trying not to laugh at what he had just responded to her with. She immediately giggled.

It wasn't a good feeling I will tell you that. To have your boyfriend in bed next to you saying god knows what to another girl who was all of ten feet away from us, giggling to herself. I turned away from them, towards the wall and fell asleep with tears silently running down my face.

The next morning started off way too early for my liking. Group yoga with the girls by sunrise outside on the patio. Which was beautiful, but obnoxious when I had to watch Tanya shamelessly show off for an hour straight like she was the fucking goddess of yoga. After we finished we all had a quick showers, and ate a deliciously fancy breakfast. We got our hair done and went upstairs to finish getting ready.

"I don't know how you do that Bella" Tanya said from behind me as I finished applying my winged eyeliner. "It always looks so perfect on you." Wow. Tanya was actually complimenting me? This was the first thing she had said to me the whole time she has been here. She was right, I could kill a winged eyeliner and I knew it. My inner goddess sparkled.

"Thanks." I replied back forcing a small smile.

Before I knew it we were outside taking pictures. This was exciting, I hope Emily found the right one, he really is a nice guy and I hope she's not just using this one for his money again.

We all stood around holding glasses of drinks of our choice, taking in the beautiful scenery as the time of the wedding drew near.

"Cullen!" Sam shouted standing across from me in our little standing circle.

I turned to look behind me as I could hear someone approaching.

"Babe!" Tanya squealed.

"Hey Cullen, long time no see man!" Sam greeted him as they shook hands. He then walked over to take his place next to Tanya.

"Everybody, this is Edward" Tanya introduced smugly. He smirked and put his hand up as if to wave at all of us.

Tanya went around the circle introducing us all to Edward and she paused as she got to me. "That's Bella" She stated sounding unamused. "And this is Jacob" She informed him as she got to Jake standing next to me.

"Hey man" Edward said to him as he shook Jacob's hand. Their exchange was strange. There was a certain kind of tension in the air.

Edward was almost as tall as Jacob, with a very slender build and broad shoulders. His hair was a unique shade of a mix between auburn and golden brown, and his eyes a striking emerald green. I wasn't the kind of girl to look at other men while I was in a relationship but I would be lying if I said I didn't think he was beautiful.

"Alright kids, it's time to start lining up, everybody get into your places!" Emily yelled to us, pulling me from my thoughts.

The ceremony was beautiful and went off without a hitch.

We flowed into the reception shortly after and it didn't take long before most everybody was intoxicated. Now here's the thing, Jacob was strongly against alcohol. Why you may ask? Jacob in the pit of his depression in early high school turned to drinking. Sam provided it for him and he did nothing for a while but nearly drink himself to death. He recognized he had the beginnings of a problem after a while, and vowed not to drink anymore. I fully supported him in that, which in turn meant I also chose to not drink as I knew how he felt about it and I wanted to respect that.

The alcohol was flowing around us and as the night went on, Jacob seemed to become more and more uncomfortable.

"Let's go out to the camper Bells, I want to be out of this building." Jake said finally as he stood up. Emily's new husband had brought along their camper and parked it in the back yard of the building as there surely wasn't going to be enough sleeping spaces there for all of the obliterated people after the festivities.

Jake and I sauntered out to the camper as pitch dark storm clouds started to roll in around us. There was supposed to be a major storm here tonight, and rain and storms seemed to be weather Jake and I thrived. We were excited for it. We ended up sitting in the camper playing cards and watching the sky turn purple around us for a good hour or so before the camper door swung open.

Sam and his girlfriend, Tanya and Edward all burst into the camper looking like they had an agenda.

"You guys, can we hang out in here for a bit? Mom told us to come out here for the night." Sam slurred with two drinks in his hands.

Jacob groaned and stood up. "Come on Bella."

I followed Jake out of the camper and as we stepped out, it started to sprinkle. By the time we got back to the building, it was damn near pouring rain.

"Let's go Bella, I don't want to be here anymore surrounded by drunken idiots."

The way the building was set up was that you park your car at the way bottom of the ski hills and had to take a shuttle bus down to it as there wasn't room for parking at the top. Jake and I packed up our bags and changed out of our formal clothing and headed downstairs.

"Fuck it, I'm not waiting for the damn shuttle bus. Come on Bella we are walking down, it'll feel good to be in the rain."

Jake was right. I will never forget that ridiculous journey down the brutally muddy hill. It was the most surreal thing I had ever seen in real life weather wise. It was dark out, but the sky was constantly lit up with flashes of lightening and the thunder was absolutely booming. So here we are, walking down from the very highest point of the hill, soaking wet and full of mud. We both laughed our asses off as soon as we got down to our car at the bottom of the hill, and drove home with the craziest sexual tension only to be attended to when we arrived back at his place.

Before I knew it, almost another full year had gone by and Jacob and I had moved in together into a two bedroom unit that opened up in his apartment complex. I also had gone to cosmetology school and graduated a few weeks into living in our new place. Life felt perfect. Things were finally falling into place, and I felt one step closer to the life we had been talking about building together for years.

Our apartment was the first place I had felt finally at home in, since I was a kid. Two bedrooms, two bathrooms, high ceilings, and such cool character. We finally had a place that was ours.

I worked fifty hours a week at my salon job, and Jacob was still working at the coffee shop. I worked every day, nine a.m until seven thirty, and Jake worked five a.m to noon. We were both busy and pretty quickly had to adjust our schedules so that we could at least have our two days off together as we weren't hardly able to spend time together during the week.

Jakes phone pinged as we sat down to eat dinner together and he took a quick glance.

"Tanya is wondering if we want to go to her and Edward's place tomorrow night for dinner and a movie" Jake said taking a bite of his food.

Tanya was starting to come around more and more again, and Jake desperately wanted her and I to be friends. They were back to constantly texting and hanging out and it gave me a tight feeling in my chest. Jacob would never cheat on me… His ex had cheated on him and he knew how awful that felt. I couldn't imagine him ever wanting to inflict that kind of pain on anyone, and especially not on me. Jacob said Tanya and his best friend Paul had really hit it off as well, as Paul was now working with them at the coffee shop. The three of them supposedly were calling themselves the three musketeers and were always together. I still didn't like her, and I liked it even less that Jake and her had started hanging out again, even if most of the time Paul supposedly was there. I knew I shouldn't be jealous, but god dammit I was. I worked so damn much and she was spending more time with my boyfriend then I was.

"Edward wants to cook us dinner" He continued with food in his mouth.

"Sureeeee" I said trying not to sound too unamused.

"Edward seems like kind of a dick" Jacob said as he shoveled in another bite.

"Haven't you only met the guy the one time I did?" I questioned him.

"Yea but I don't know, I just don't like the guy. Seems like a douche."

I rolled my eyes and continued quietly with my dinner.

"I'll let T know we are coming" He continued.

T Huh? Ugh, I hated it.

Next thing I know, we were knocking at Tanya's front door.

"Hey there" Tanya answered the door, clearly only really acknowledging Jacob.

God help me I already want to leave.

She walked us up the apartment stairs and into her second floor apartment.

"Hey guys, welcome" Edward greeted us from the kitchen as we walked in.

The small apartment smelled amazing, I was immediately drawn to the stove to see what he was making.

"Homemade tortellini, I hope you like pasta." Edward said to me with a smile.

"Looks and smells amazing, I could live off of pasta I swear so yes this is perfect" I smiled back.

"Can I get you guys anything to drink?" He offered as we turned around to find that Tanya and Jake had already migrated to the other room.

Edward and I in that moment turned back to each other to make the most intense eye contact I have ever experienced in my life. It was like we both in that moment knew exactly what each other were thinking. We both didn't like each other's spouses. We both didn't feel right about things between Jacob and Tanya. I weakly forced a smile and looked down from his gaze.

"I'd love some water, just show me to the glasses and I can grab it." I said quickly, trying to brush the hurt feelings I knew we were both feeling, under the rug.

"Oh no, here I'll get some for you" He said as he snapped out of it as well.

"Can I help you with anything?" I offered as he got me some ice water.

"Nah I think I've got it all set and ready for us if you guys are hungry." He said smoothly as he handed me the glass with a kind smile.

We sat in the living room and ate as we watched some terrible movie that Tanya had picked out. Jacob and Tanya talked basically through the entire movie, and only a few times did they really even give Edward or I an opportunity to join in the discussion. I kept my head turned to the TV screen for the most part, not actually really watching it, just in my own mind thinking. I would occasionally look up and find Edward looking right at me. The look in his eyes seemed to reflect yet again, the exact thoughts I was having.

I obviously didn't know Edward, this was only my second time meeting him. But I definitely didn't get the douche vibes that Jacob had been referring to when talking about him before. He seemed like a genuinely nice guy, very well mannered, and pretty quiet.

"Thank you for the delicious meal Edward, you have a serious future in the culinary industry." I had earlier discovered that he was currently in culinary school and working in a kitchen full time for a job as well.

"Thank you Bella, I really appreciate that" He smiled as I helped him clean up our dishes.

Jacob and Tanya were still in the living room laughing about something.

"So they've been hanging out a lot with some other friend they work with, Tanya tells me?" Edward started.

"Yea that's Jake's best friend Paul, they've been friends since elementary school. I guess Emily gave Paul a job at the shop as well. Apparently they all hit it off and are now some kind of power trio"

Edward quietly laughed to himself, or was it more of a scoff? Either was acceptable really.

Tanya and Jacob appeared from the other room then and Edward and I went quiet.

We said our goodbyes and thank you's, and the guys exchanged an awkward hand shake and a nod. The last thing I saw as I turned to close the door behind me was Edwards face. That same look in his eyes that had gripped me before. We both knew.

**Alright guys the story is about to take a serious turn so buckle up, excitement is coming! **

**Please like and review! **

**Xx, M**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys sorry it took a minute to get this chapter up, I have been crazy busy! I hope you guys enjoy! this has been really awesome to write, yet somewhat difficult as this story is all based off of my own life and relationships!**

**Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight.**

**Roll On Chapter 2!**

"I think we should buy a house Bella." Jake said one night out of the blue as we sat watching TV.

"Buy a house?"

"Yea, I've been thinking about it and I think we should just go for it."

This came as a major surprise and very out of nowhere for him, but I was pleasantly surprised by it.

We talked about the pros and cons of it that night and before I knew it, we were on the hunt. We went to the bank to see what we could get pre approved for, and to my pleasant surprise we qualified for a pretty hefty amount.

"This is the amount you two technically qualify for combined with both of your incomes." The woman at the bank gestured to the paper. "I does make it a little bit more complicated since you two are not married, there is a completely separate protocol that we take her for non married applicants." She explained.

"Will you marry me?" Jake jokingly said immediately after the woman spoke.

"Oh shut up Jake that's not funny." I retorted, knowing full well he was completely joking. The woman gave him a displeased face that more then likely mimicked mine.

It stung. Jake and I had been together just under five years at this point, and he had made it very clear in the last year that he thought marriage was dumb. Of course me being me, I figured he was just being a dumb boy scared of commitment.

"Marriage has no value" His voice rang in my mind, replaying the night he told me that.

For years he knew that I wanted marriage. He knew exactly what I wanted. I wanted the house, the dog, the marriage and the children. I always brushed off how much he laughed at me about it.

I knew that he just thought marriage was a stupid thing because he had watched his mom get married three times and only do it for money. But Jake knew I wasn't like that.

"Don't ever jump into a marriage because of home buying." The woman quickly said with a serious tone immediately after his dumb ass remark.

She gathered our paperwork for us and send us on our way, we were now qualified for a home and could officially start looking.

We looked at a few houses but nothing we saw, did Jake seem to like. He had the most unrealistic expectations and insisted we were in a specific neighborhood of town, down by the coffee shop. Of course it was one of the most expensive area in town, which only made it harder.

"Jesus Jacob you scared the hell out of me." I hissed as I woke up to the feeling of someone staring at me. Jake was sitting on the edge of our bed watching me sleep. "What time is it?"

He didn't answer me, he just stared. I looked at the clock on the nightstand and it was almost three a.m.

"Did you just get home? Come on, get into bed." I tried to coax him.

He flopped down next to me and stared at the ceiling. I could just hardly see his face with the outside lights shining in through the window.

Oh no… He reeked.

"Where were you, a bar? You smell like cigarettes and booze Jacob." I said hesitantly as I tried to blink the sleep from my eyes.

"Just hung out at Tanya's." He slurred and rolled away from me.

You had got to be kidding me.

Jake and I had both occasionally smoked a cigarette or two back in high school, but had both passed that phase a couple years back. And Jacob did not drink, so this was an instant red flag as it was, all Tanya things aside.

For the past several weeks, Jacob and Tanya had been hanging out almost every night. It was like clockwork, I would be at work all day and be excited to come to him, and as soon as I would get home he'd leave.

I had to believe the best in him. He would never do me wrong. He couldn't. Jacob swore up and down most nights that Paul was with them and that they weren't alone, but I had my doubts. And now I had to doubt it even more, as Paul knew Jake didn't drink and for good reason. Paul wouldn't have allowed Jacob to drink this much, I knew he wouldn't.

Before I knew it, Jacob was snoring next to me pulling me from my thoughts. He was still fully clothed, and laying on top of the covers. I fell asleep next to him that night with my head spinning with thoughts and my stomach full of knots.

"I don't like it Bella…" My best friend Jane said hesitantly as she drove me home from work.

"I don't like it either Jane, but I'm sure I am just being ridiculous. Jacob swears up and down there are no feelings aside from friendship between them." I said trying to believe my own words.

"She's a snake Bella, an absolute snake. I can smell that shit from a mile away."

"Tell me about it" I mumbled.

"She is an ugly person inside and out" Jane continued with much upset. "She had to have known Jake isn't a drinker, how are you friends with another adult and not know that they selectively choose not to drink?"

"Oh she knows he doesn't normally drink, he constantly scolds everyone else about it." I said full well knowing the acidic tone I was spewing.

"Did you talk with her boyfriend at all when you guys were there? Did he seem like a nice enough guy? Where the hell was he while they were getting drunk at their place?" She shot question after question.

"Edward? Yea, actually he seemed like a really nice guy." I said as I looked out the window. "I'm assuming he was at work, I know he works late in the kitchen. Makes me wonder if he knew that Jacob was even over there while he was gone at work."

"I can't imagine he would, no guy would probably be all too comfortable with that. Did him and Jake still seem weird when you guys were there for dinner? I remember you saying that they didn't really seem to like each other before."

"It was so fucking awkward Jane. You could have cut the tension with a knife." I cringed just thinking back on it.

"You need to have another serious conversation with Jacob, Bella. This can't keep going this way, this is driving you mad and rightfully so. Look at yourself Bella, you are absolutely miserable." She said sounding sorry for me.

I didn't need her to feel sorry for me, I was already feeling sorry enough for myself.

As soon as I got home, I found Jake in the living room.

"Tanya and Edward broke up." He told me as I sat down.

"Oh. Really?" I said feeling both surprised and not, at the same time.

"Tanya is staying at moms house in my old bedroom for a while until she figures things out" He informed me.

Of course she ran to Emily's. Why wouldn't she run to my boyfriends mother? Unbelievable.

"I'm going to go over there and console her for a little while, she's having a really rough time. I really hate that Cullen guy." He said, immediately standing up.

I was frozen. The whole conversation Jane and I had just had in the car, went right out of my mind.

"Bella, I know you and Tanya aren't exactly the best of friends," He spoke, now putting his shoes on. "But she could really probably use the kindness of a girl right now. Would you please try to reach out to her at some point?"

I couldn't even say anything. I just sat there, watching my boyfriend leave to go comfort another girl as I sat there in my own internal hurt.

"Bella?" He snapped. I looked up at him. "Please. I'll be back later." And with that, he was out the door.

Now, you can go ahead and slap me at this next part because I promise you, I too am slapping myself.

A few days later at work, I texted Tanya.

**Me: Hey, it's Bella. Jacob told me you could use some girl time. I'm sorry to hear about you and Edward. I've got a while free on my schedule today at 1, why don't you come in and I will treat you to a mani and a pedi.**

**Tanya: That sounds great, I will be there. **

"You are kidding me right" Jane scoffed as I told her. Jane also worked with me at the salon.

"Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer, right?" I responded.

"Shit I guess." She said and waved me away.

At promptly one o'clock Tanya walked into the salon and I got her soaking in the pedicure tub.

We made awkward small talk at first and before too long we got into the real conversation.

"Edward has become such a burn out, Bella." Tanya explained to me as I was working away on her feet. "All he does is work and come home and smoke weed. He constantly is saying how I am making him feel unappreciated, but dammit I need to feel appreciated too every now and again. It's not that we weren't having sex or anything, we had a lot of sex, but damn I don't know what he wants from me."

I instantly thought of myself. Jake wasn't a huge sexual being and we maybe had sex once a month for the last several months now.

"Do you think you guys can work it out?" I asked her.

"Don't see how, I haven't talked to him since I left."

She proceeded to talk for the next hour or so, strictly about herself and all I could do was listen.

"You're so lucky to have Jacob, Bella." She told me as I was now working on her fingers.

"He's a pretty good egg." I said truthfully. "I do feel pretty lucky to have him."

She proceeded to ask me a few questions about our relationship while I gave her a manicure and I answered them all honestly. I told her truthfully about a lot of my life and put all my cards out onto the table. I felt strange divulging a lot of this to her, as we had never been any kind of friend, but in the moment it was really easy to get swept up in her. I can only assume this was why everyone else was so drawn to her as well. She had a way to get words out of you. To get you to talk. To get you to feel under her spell if you will. Before I knew it, we were done and I sent Tanya freshly manicured and pedicured, on her way.

You'd better believe I used my own hard earned money, to pay for her seventy dollar service I had just given her myself. I immediately felt pulled different directions. I felt like an idiot for being so nice to her, yet while she was here I had no reason not to be. She was mainly pretty pleasant.

Yes, again. I know. You can slap me.

"You still going to talk to Jake about everything?" Jane asked me as the two of us sat eating dinner at our favorite sushi restaurant a few nights later.

"I think I have to. He's been over at his moms with Tanya every night but one, since she moved in there."

"Do you realize how weird it is that she's just made herself at home in Jakes old bedroom, Bella?" She asked as she took a bite of her spicy roll.

"Oh trust me, its weird as shit to know she's sleeping in the old room that we used to fuck in, in high school." I said honestly.

"I still can't believe you had her come into work and _paid_ to _give_ her a spa package." She stressed the words.

"Trust me, I can't believe it either. Jake said she can't stop talking about it though, so hopefully it did help her feel even a little bit better about her breakup with Edward."

I remembered how bad it hurt when Jake and I had broken up a while back, and I admit, that did make me feel empathetic for her.

"I just don't want you to have this weird nonsense between you guys go on forever Bells" She reminded me with a stern look.

I had been thinking about it for a while now, and I knew she was right. I was finally feeling confident enough to try and re approach the subject with him tonight when I got home, I was just scared.

I was sick of the pit feeling I got in my stomach every time I thought about it though, and I knew I couldn't continue on like this any longer.

I pulled out my phone to text Jacob.

**Me: Hey I need to talk to you when I get home if that's cool."**

Immediately he wrote back. My stomach was in knots.

**Jake: I'm going out with Paul and Tanya soon, so only if you are home before then.**

I immediately read it out loud to Jane and she rolled her eyes and said, "You need to tell him that he can wait."

**Me: Can you please hold off a little bit? I really need to talk to you. This is important.**

**Jake: I guess, are you going to be home soon then? **

**Me: I guess…**

**Jake: K. **

I always know he's annoyed when all I get in response is a "K".

Jane and I finished up our meal and too soon after, we were standing up from the table. "Stand your ground Bella, this has been going on for too long." Jane reminded me with a hug.

My stomach was in knots on the drive home. I knew this could't keep going without one more important attempt at fixing things. No more getting my hopes up, excited to spend time with him just to find out he was leaving to hang out with someone else. No more feeling like he didn't care anymore.

No more, I reminded myself the whole way home.

I absolutely felt like I was going to vomit as I walked into the apartment and walked to our bedroom. Jacob was sitting on the edge of the bed messing around on his phone.

"Hey." I said meekly.

"Hey."

I walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge of the bed with him.

"Jacob, you and I both know that something is wrong… Every time I come home, you leave." I started, knowing full well things were about to go south. "It kills me to feel like you never want to spend time with me anymore…"

He just looked at me. And the look in his eyes was like nothing I had ever seen from him before. He didn't say a word.

"I can't live like this anymore Jake" My voice broke as I spoke. "We aren't the same… You've been so distant and I know you aren't happy with me and this relationship anymore. I just want to feel happy again Jacob." My depression had been creeping back in something fierce day by day.

Still, Jacob didn't say a word. "Jake?"

"I don't feel like we fit anymore Bella…" He finally said.

So this was really happening. Was it true that every suspicion I had could be true?

The tears were trailing down my face at this point. "I can't do this anymore Jacob." I sobbed.

We sat there in silence for a minute, me sobbing and Jake tearing up now as well.

"I don't know what to say Bella." He choked.

I could hardly see through my tear filled eyes as I tried to slow my breathing. I was about to go into a full blown panic.

"I need to get out of here." I stood up quickly and ran to my closet. I pulled out the first big bag I could find and started packing my bag in a panic.

Jacob just sat there crying himself, as I ran around our room crying hysterically and throwing everything in the bag that I thought I could possibly need for the next few days. I loved this apartment, I didn't want to leave. But my first instinct was to run. I felt like my heart was being ripped from my body and profusely beaten. This was nothing like our last breakup. This was different. Jacob and I were so close to the things that I had always wanted. Nearly five years together and things were crumbling around me. I could hardly breathe.

"Bella you don't need to pack up the whole apartment right now. I'll go stay at Paul's." He finally spoke while tears streamed from his face.

It only made me cry harder. I had to leave. Jacob and I were really done this time, that much I knew. I could feel it in my soul. I looked back at him one last time still sitting on the edge of the bed, from the door way.

"Goodbye Jacob."

I ran downstairs as fast as I could. I couldn't be there for a second longer, I felt crushed to the core on a completely different level. I got into my car and threw my overflowing bag on the passengers seat beside me. Immediately I broke down into full sobs again the moment I was seated. I would go to my dads. He and I had been working on mending our relationship and I knew he always had a place for me.

It was getting dark as I pulled into my dads driveway, still crying uncontrollably. He must've heard my car coming, my muffler was horrendous. Before I even got to the door with my bag in tow, he was at the back door holding it open for me. I collapsed into him immediately and dropped my bag. We stood there in the entry way for what felt like an eternity.

My dad wasn't really a talker, but he had really gotten better at comforting me over the years in his own way. He meant well. He grabbed my bag off the floor without saying a word, and brought it into my old room. I followed him down the hallway still not saying a word, and climbed into bed.

"I'll be in the living room if you need me Bells." He assured me quietly as he walked from the room, closing the door behind him. He knew I wouldn't want to talk.

Through tear filled eyes, I sent my boss a text letting her know what had happened and that I wouldn't be at work the next day. I knew she would be mad, it was a Saturday and that was my busiest day. But I knew I couldn't work in this condition. I needed time.

I don't remember falling asleep that night, all I remember was crying uncontrollably under the covers. The moment I woke up the next day I immediately remembered what had transpired the night before. I was immediately crying again. I laid in bed and cried for probably another good hour or so before I calmed myself down.

I finally composed myself enough to get up and walk out to the living room. My dad was sitting in his chair watching some kind of fishing show as I joined him. I plopped myself down on the couch and stared at the TV. I couldn't bring myself to even look at my dad, I could feel him looking at me with concern. We continued to not say a word to each other as we sat watching people fish.

Finally after a period of time, I finally spoke. "Jacob and I broke up." I don't think I even had tears left at this point.

He just shook his head in understanding. "Sorry to hear that Bells."

And that was that. The entire rest of the day I hung around at my dads house, he made me lunch and we sat in the living room watching television.

By the end of the night, the panic started to set in all over again. I had to go home. I missed my home. I didn't even think twice about it. I just re packed up my bag, thanked my dad and was on my way home.

Jacob wasn't there when I got home thankfully. I of course started crying as soon as I walked back into the bedroom I had left him in, the night before. I got myself into some pajamas and situated myself back into bed, just ready to be in my comfy place again.

Thank god it was Saturday night and I had Sundays and Mondays off, so I knew I had a few days to get my shit together. I of course texted Jane and filled her in on what was going on, and unfortunately she wasn't surprised, just like I wasn't. This was a while in the makings. Jacob had been distancing himself for a while now.

I put something on the TV and watched for a few hours trying to calm myself down, but still continuing to cry on and off.

That basically continued for the next two days. I did a lot of crying, and a lot of hugging Jake's pillow. I was a mess, but I knew I had to be. It was part of the healing process.

I left the house once all weekend to run to the grocery store. I kept it together the whole shopping trip and the as I was about two minutes from home, my car broke down. Yep, you read that right. I was driving down the road and as I came up to a four way stop, the fucking car shut off. It absolutely would not turn over for anything. I knew that my old car was on its last leg but why did it have to break down two days after breaking up with Jacob? As if I hadn't already been having a hard enough time. I sat there in my dead car in the middle of the intersection, and couldn't help but put my head down on the wheel and cry.

I suddenly heard a knock at my window.

I looked up and there was a man standing outside my car looking concerned. "Are you okay?" He asked me as I rolled down the window. I couldn't even answer him I was crying so hard. "Go ahead and put it into neutral and I'll push you out of the intersection."

I did as he said, and steered the wheel so I was now on the other side of the intersection broken down on the side of the road. I thanked the guy for helping and immediately called my dad. Charlie had me call a tow truck to have them bring my car to his house, and he came and brought me home with my groceries.

I would also just like to point out, it was the first week in February and we were due to have a snow storm hit us any day now. Yea, cool life Bella. Doing great. Now I had no car, and no boyfriend.

Jacob never came home, and any time I thought about him my mind was flooded with memories and I immediately missed him. I wished nothing more then to have him back and to have things be like they used to, but I knew that it wasn't going to happen. We weren't the same anymore.

I went back to work on Tuesday, Jane came and picked me up. I struggled through the day but working did keep my mind at least temporarily occupied. Every night I would go home and find myself in a fit of sobs all over again, but managed to get myself to work over the next few days.

I still hadn't heard from Jacob, but on Tuesday night when I got home from work I could tell that he had been there, and then again on Thursday. The bathroom smelled like his body wash, and hie towel was hanging there still damp. He must have come home to shower and grab more clothes while he knew I was at work.

Friday night came around and we were already at a week since our separation, I had no car and I was a hot damn mess. My phone vibrated next to me as I laid in bed after work watching one of my favorite shows from bed, trying to distract myself.

**Jacob: Can you talk tomorrow night after you get off of work? **

My heart sunk. I knew we were going to have to talk at some point, but I didn't know if I would be able to bare it.

**Me: Sounds good, I will be home around seven thirty.**

He didn't respond and of course I had to have myself a good cry yet again. I had never cried so much in my life as I had that past week.

The next day by the time I came home from work, I was sick to my stomach. Jacob would be coming over any time now, and all I could do was sit in the living room waiting for him.

I heard his keys jingle outside the door for a moment, and then there he was.

He made his way over to the couch and sat down not saying a word.

"Hey Jake." I started quietly.

"How're you doing Bella?" He asked sounding genuinely concerned.

"I've been better I've got to say." I admitted laughing a little trying not to cry instantly.

"Same." We sat there in silence for a minute. "I didn't expect you to come back here." He finally said.

"Yea neither did I." I admitted. "This is my home Jacob." I started to cry then not able to keep it together anymore. "I want to stay here."

"That's fair. I'm okay with that." He replied.

"Jacob I need to ask you one thing.." He looked right at me. "Do you have feelings for Tanya?"

"No." He said sounding genuine.

"You promise?"

"Yes Bella. I don't have feelings for Tanya." I wanted to believe him, but I knew better. "I just want us to be happy Bella. I want you to find somebody that can give you everything that you want out of life… I want nothing more then to see you years from now, run into you in a grocery store or something. And I want to see you with some nice guy, married, pregnant and genuinely happy."

I smiled but sobbed as he spoke.

"I just know that I can't be the person to give you that Bella… I just can't see myself with that life. I can't picture myself as a dad or a husband to anyone. I feel like it's just not me."

"I want you to be happy too Jacob." I whispered. We were both crying now. "It is so hard for me to picture my life without you."

"We've been through a lot together." He nodded and agreed. "Well, I'm the reason we aren't together so I will keep paying my portion of the rent until the year lease is up in May, and you can live here. I don't need my furniture so I will just leave it here for you for now if you want."

"Thank you." I whispered still crying.

We finished making our plans, he packed up a bag of his clothes, and before I knew it he was gone.

I felt somewhat better after seeing Jacob and talking things out a little bit better with him and actually ending on an okay note. The next week was a little bit easier, but still was a major adjustment. I was in our big apartment all alone, and the whole apartment was filled with Jakes belongings.

About a week and a half after Jake and I talked, I was hanging out on a Wednesday evening with Jane in the living room. "Have you talked to Tanya's ex at all?"

"Edward? No."

Just then my phone buzzed next to me.

It was Jake's younger brother Quil.

**Quil: Hey Bella, I'm really sorry to hear about you and Jake, and I am really sorry to tell you this, but I feel like I owe it to you to let you know the truth. Jake and Tanya have been in the bedroom next to me at moms house for a while now and have been since the night you guys broke up. I feel like I have to tell you. They're sleeping together Bella, and they have been for a while… This has been their plan in the makings for a while now to leave you and Edward, for each other. I have overheard them talking about it for a few weeks now. I don't want to betray my brother like this, but you have been my sister for years now and I owe you this since I know you are never going to get it from him. **

My blood was _boiling. _My face probably said it all. Jane gestured for me to hand her the phone to see what I had just read.

I fucking knew it. I knew it. I had believed Jacob and I felt like such a fucking idiot.

"Holy shit Bella.." Jane said with sorrow in her voice as she handed me back my phone. "I wonder if Edward knows… Maybe you should reach out to him, he is the one other person who is probably going through the exact same thing you are right now Bells."

I felt sick. Sick to my core. I knew it. After all of this time of Jacob telling me I was crazy… Of him swearing up and down that there was nothing going on. I felt like such a dumb ass.

"I don't even think we are Facebook friends." I replied, feeling absolutely numb.

"I think you should talk to him Bella… He has the right to know the truth too and I think that would probably help you to talk about it some more with someone who is in your spot too."

The rest of the night went by in a blur. I was past even being sad at this point. Now, I was mad. I was fucking furious. By the time I put myself into bed I was fuming from ear to ear. I was just sick. How long had this been going on? I needed to know more. I would have to text Quil back in the morning and talk to him more in depth.

I pulled up my phone and brought up the Facebook app. Tanya Denali, BLOCK.

I did some more scrolling through Facebook before his picture popped up on my suggested friends list… Edward Cullen.

I didn't know what the right thing to do was. Edward did deserve to know, but would he even want to hear anything from me? We weren't friends, we had only met twice. I thought about it for a few minutes and finally, I hit request.

I put my phone down immediately after. What if this was a bad idea? Should I really be bothering him?

Fuck I can't believe I was this stupid. Man was I mad. I was livid. Those motherfuckers made me look so fucking stupid. I couldn't even believe it. This was not my Jacob anymore, this was somebody else, and I didn't like him.

Just then, my phone lit up with a notification.

Edward Cullen has accepted your friend request.

My heart thumped. My god I was anxious.

Not even thirty seconds later, another notification. It was a message… From Edward.

"So it's true then, they're together then aren't they?"

Holy fuck.

**Well there you go guys, hope you enjoyed the second chapter! Get ready because now it's Edward's time to shine! **

**I'd love to hear from you guys so please review and let me know your thoughts! Things are about to start getting juicy!**

**Xx, M**


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